Allen Hood talked about martyrdom in class yesterday. It struck me because he
was talking about how God saves some and others he lets die. It is not for us
to know why, but to continue to believe he is sovereign and in control. One of the main reasons it hit me was because I’ve
felt like since I was 12 that I was going to be martyred. Especially with my
calling to the 10/40 window, I know that threat is very real and close to me. When I ask myself, are you scared?, the answer in my heart is no. I know that whatever God has called me to, he will equip me for. No matter what that may entail. But I know that I need equipping. This is not something that is accomplished in one's own strength. Martyrdom is the great sacrifice of love. To not love oneself unto death and to fully give yourself to the desire of God for your life. It is an act of picking up your cross and following his call for you. Some are called to be rescued and saved to show God's power and might, while others are called to be sacrificed to show that his love is worth everything, even life itself. Martyrdom need not be a hyped up reality. It is a serious and sobering calling. To those he calls, he equips.
God, begin now to
prepare my heart for not only surviving imprisonment and suffering, but
thriving and remaining strong in who I know you to be. Strengthen me even now
to be faithful to the point of death, not withholding anything from you. Allow
my heart to remain alive in you and in your word. Prepare me for the greatest
testament of my faith. Prepare me to die for you.
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